Thursday, January 11, 2018

"Wing Man for the 21st Century"

Job Opening ...

Sexual Ombudsman

Job Description:

1. Be available to participate on behalf of employer in all male-female interactions.

2. Draft documents(s) of consent, with any and all particulars of what is and what is not permissible and appropriate.

3. Monitoring behavior(s) to validate conforming to said agreed upon conditions and/or prohibitions.

4. Sign affidavit attesting to proceedings and outcomes; both successful engagements, and claimed infractions.

5. Participate in any and all cases of contention, conflict resolution.

6. Must sign a no-contest agreement vis-a-vis any future claims against employer.

7. Must be skilled in audio-visual documentation.







Monday, January 08, 2018


"Now, here, so vivid, so alive, filled with joy, waiting for you to see it."

Roshi Sama:

There is a stone here in the graveyard upon which these words are carved: “We were once just as you are now, you will become as we are now.” How is that? The fact is: everyone passes on. Impermanence is swift. No matter how blessed you may feel in your present circumstances, how easygoing, how secure and pleased you are: you cannot hang on to that world. It will be jerked out from under you. Impermanence is swift. The lining of your present life is death. The problem of life and death is no one else’s problem. It is yours to deal with.

And than there are the many desires. You can’t get what you want, it never seems quite right, never enough. Dissatisfaction and frustration seem to surface. There are so very many people who worry about what would seem to be no problem at all. Liberation from suffering. The more you know of this world, the more you see it to be a giant exhibition of suffering. Everywhere you look, you see plenty of examples of misery.

What about you? Have you no pain, no suffering, no worries, no fears? If you honestly think: “Hey, not me. I can meet it as it comes, go with the flow, I am not afraid, I can always be at peace,” than you are fooling yourself, giving yourself license, seeing yourself for what you are not. You are caught up in a self-notion, clinging to an ego-idea. And lost in that self you cannot hear the cry or see the tears of others. If you can overlook those tears, you are not a person of great peace of mind.

The depth of Truth is bottomless. Your interconnection is bottomless. A single grass in the field is perfect Buddha. How utterly one are all things. The grasses, the trees, the great earth, the great sky, all being is born in relation to all things. This is the true self, the perfect self. No matter what: all is goodness. However, because of deluded perception beings fail to realize their inherent Buddha-nature. Truth is universal and complete. Can you receive and embrace thoroughly this one truth?

(…)

There is something urging you to look deeper, something which seeks to be known: don’t you see it yet? Isn’t it clear yet? You are sitting here because you cannot help but seek truth. The genuine seeks to know itself. Truth is seeking truth. That is why you are here, putting heart and mind into meditation. Your time of awakening will come. No one is hopeless. Life is not mean. No one is left out. There is no one who is more or less Buddha than any other. True nature is never lost, never hidden from you. It only seems that you have to go looking for it.

But you have long lifetimes of fooling yourself, protecting your self-cherishing. When you have come to life again, to awakening, it will be so clear that there is no “self” and other.” There is no opposition, just this one reality. What appears as opposition is simply the result of the self-centered view, which is of course the incorrect view. This bad habit and wrong view causes untold suffering, for yourself and for others. And you will continue to create suffering as you go on living in falsehood. You will continue to experience suffering, fear, a sense of lacking, and you’re not helping anybody.

What you think you are, who you think yourself to be is so entirely mistaken. Grasping “self” you obviously fail to see who you really are. You try to hold what cannot possibly be held, for where is there anything fixed? Change is swift. Because you try to hold on you feel so much anxiety, it’s inevitable. How could you know true satisfaction? Dissatisfied you look restlessly out here, out there. Your base-camp is “I, me, mine.” You grasp it, you seek to rely on it. You are relying upon a phantom. You grasp this phantom-self and ceaselessly try to satisfy it. What lengths do we go through to gratify the self. We get what we want for a time and then we lose it, up, down, up and down. We try to rely on our clever thinking. How could there be any true peace of mind? How could you even begin to give to the great universe as you receive? Your compassion could only remain half-baked, locked as you are in “I, me, mine.” You are doing your practice because you have determined to receive life as it is, to come home to Life. You will meet with true self.

(…) We human beings rely on our discriminating intellect. How arrogant we are. “This is mine, this is what I deserve, credit should come here, this is the way it should be.” We compare in contrast and in so doing we shrink our world so small. We get so down on ourselves. We feel so very sorry for ourselves. And, by turn, we are so proud of ourselves. We wonder why the world doesn’t turn as we think it should. We become so dark and down and than we joke to cover our insecurities. Lost in self we can’t help wondering “where is the value of this, what am I doing this for?” We wonder if there is any meaning in what we are doing. What about you? Are you clear, crystal-clear, about what you are doing? What are you living for? Birth, aging, illness and death come quick. Your world as you know it is pulled out from under you in a flash.

It seems no time ago at all that I first met my teacher Daiun Roshi for the first time. I could only judge the world by my own hard held beliefs. We have to break through this, to see the beauty. And here, some fifty-five years have flashed by. Now, here. All the universe is embraced in the One. I can assure you that all is well. All eternity is now, here. Bold, clear, dignified. Now, here, so vivid, so alive, filled with joy, waiting for you to see it. “I will do whatever I can to benefit another.” This is just life as it is, naturally.

Please, please see it: everything is alive. Great, great Alive. This is the happiness of all happiness. And this “now here” can never be destroyed. The light of your eternal life is shining brightly, now. What joy there is in this radiance. Please, take care of yourself, your shining Buddha-self. Become ever more able to appreciate your Buddha-self. That is not to say be arrogant. There is nowhere anyone to feel small, no one to be made small, no one to feel superior, no one toward whom you could feel superior. So who are you to feel vain and proud when your very source is all being? You are supported, you are nurtured, you are guarded by all being. Thanks to all being, together, one, is all the universe. This breath is breathed, so close, always one, always together. Please never forsake the limitless treasure which is you yourself. Be in touch, simply do not look away. Grasp nothing, hold nothing. There is just now, here, fresh, new, alive.

Now. Just do your practice with all good grace.

Harada Tangen Roshi




Friday, January 05, 2018


The Drobkin Fart

Dr. Drobkin is a world famous authority in a highly specialized field of cardiology. He had gotten his undergraduate degree, his medical degree, and his PhD in his hometown. After that he was practicing as a research doctor at the highest level in New York.

He wrote a significant paper and has been invited to deliver the paper at a conference, which by coincidence is in his hometown. He is called to the dais. The room is full of distinguished personages; the men wearing tuxedos, the women properly attired for such an august event. Dr. Dropkin approaches the dais and puts his papers on the lectern. As he’s about to give his talk, suddenly the papers all slide down to the floor. He bends over to pick them up, and as he does his tuckus is against the microphone. And at the very wrong moment, he lets one ride. It reverberates around the room, magnified by the microphone.

Somehow he regains his composure and delivers the paper. No sooner is he done but he grabs everything up and makes a quick exit through a rear door, vowing never to come back to the town again.

Many years pass, his mother is on in years and he has to go back to town to care for her. He does so under the name Dr. Cohen. He makes a reservation at the local Hyatt under that name and gets there under cover of darkness. As he checks into the hotel, a bright eyed and bushy tailed room clerk says, “Good evening Dr. Cohen, have you ever been in our town before?”

The doctor says, “Yes, as a matter of fact, young man, I grew up here and I got my education here; got my undergraduate, my doctorate, and my medical degrees at the university and I moved away.”

The young man asks, “So why haven’t you been here for so long?”

“Well, a number of years ago a very embarrassing thing happened here, and I just didn’t feel I could come back and face the people in the town.”

The young man says, “Doctor, far be it for me, a young stripling, to advise a distinguished older gentleman such as you. But, if I can give you anything from my experience in my young life, things that I thought were embarrassing and people noticed, I later found out that nobody even knew that they happened. And I’m sure that’s probably true about the thing you think is so embarrassing.”

The doctor says, “No, I doubt that anyone has forgotten what happened.”

The young man says, “Well, was it a long time ago?”

“Yes, it was a very long time ago.”


 “Was it before the Drobkin fart, or after?”

Wednesday, January 03, 2018


One day in the park ...

A pretty young girl is walking her doggy. 

A woman sitting on a park bench is so charmed by the sight, she exclaims, "Little girl, you look so pretty!"

The girl says, "Thank you ma'am. My Mommy did my hair extra special today."

The women: "And, that's such a cute dress!"

"Yes", says the girl. "My sweet Aunty sewed it especially for me!" 

"And, what a nice little doggy!" 

"Yes", the girl adds, "he's my best friend in the whole wide world!"

"What is your puppy's name?"

"His name is 'Porky'."

The woman remarks, "That's a interesting name for a dog. How come you call him 'Porky'?"

The most darling, pretty little girl responds, "We call him 'Porky' because he likes to fuck pigs!"

Monday, January 01, 2018


Woman #1: "My husband loves me so much. He gave me this beautiful Mink coat and a complete spa treatment at the Elizabeth Arden Red Door spa."

Woman #3: "That'sa nice."

Woman #2: "My husband loves me so much. He took me for an around the world cruise. First class. Shopping in Paris and Milan."

Woman #3: "That'sa nice."

"What did your husband give you?"

Woman #3: "My husband loves me so much. He gave me etiquette lessons. Now I say 'That'sa nice', instead of 'Bullshit!' ".


Monday, December 25, 2017

Our Christmas Goddess Miracle


On Christmas Eve last night we shopped at a local supermarket. When we were putting our things into the car an old woman approached us and asked whether the bottle of soda pop laying on the ground belonged to us. It didn’t. She took it herself.

Then, she asked us if we could drive her home.

In her shopping cart there were four packages of bottled water on special sale and a few other items. Plus her found bottle of soda. She said that she walked to the store from her home, and planned to walk back.

But, we came along.

We loaded her things into the vehicle and drove her home. In checking the route it turned out that it was a 1.3 mile trip.

The amazing thing is that those packages of bottle water each weighted 29 pounds. That’s 116 pounds; a total of around 120 pounds counting the other items.

Imagine: That old women was going to walk back home in the frigid night air 1.3 miles pulling a 120 pound grocery cart. It was cold. And, in the dark! [Hey, it was on special sale, after all.]

Her name is Meenakshi, of Indian descent. 

Seems the legend of the Goddess Meenakshi tells of her travelling a bit too. 




Sunday, December 24, 2017


Very Wronski Christmas








 






 
Ever since she was a little girl Aunt Edna made a point to put out something nice for Santa every Christmas Eve.














Saturday, December 09, 2017

Appropriate and Inapropriate

A fellow is walking his pet duck when he passes a movie theater and discovers that the last showing of a movie he really wants to see is just about to start. 

There’s no time to take the duck back home, so he stuffs the hapless bird into his pants and goes in to see the movie.

The movie is running and the duck starts to get edgy. The man is patting the duck through his pants in an effort to calm it down.

It just so happens that two old ladies are sitting next to him and one of them can't help but see all the patting and stroking.

“Ethel, the man next to me is playing with himself!”

“Pay him no attention, and he’ll stop,” advises Ethel.

Well, time passes but the duck is getting more and more agitated being so confined. So the man unzips his trousers and lets the duck stick its head out.

“Ethel, Ethel. Now he is deliberately exposing himself!”

“Never mind,” says Ethel. “You’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.”


“Yah. But, but . . . this one’s eating my popcorn!”

Monday, November 27, 2017

The Correct Negation of 'Self'


THE 5TH. SAMDHONG RINPOCHE, LOBSANG TENZIN


Today when we talk about the Buddha’s teaching of selflessness or the not-self or Shunyata, people mostly cannot comprehend the real connotations of these teachings. And they always fall into the error of negating the relative self. When you speak of selflessness, they take it to mean that they are completely devoid of self, that self does not exist at all.

It is only in Buddhism and in some non-Buddhist Indian traditions that the Truth is classified into two levels: the Ultimate Truth and the Relative Truth. And these two need to be understood at their respective levels. They are two sides of one coin, yet they differ vastly. The key point is that, if you deny the relative truth, then you cannot realize Shunyata, but will fall into nihilism instead: the negation of everything.

The Buddha does not negate the relative existence of anything, but teaches that whatever exists in the relative or conventional sense, exists interdependently and the common-sense of the interdependent nature of things cannot be denied by anyone. It is truth; it is a fact. Things do not exist as we view them in this moment, we who do not realise the true nature of existence. The ordinary person views phenomena as existing by their own nature, complete and independent in themselves. They impute the quality of inherent existence to these phenomena, as they do to the self. But the fact is that relative phenomena, including the self, exist in interdependence on each other and on a myriad bases. This quality of interdependence does not imply that relative phenomena simply do not exist at all, but only that their existence is not inherent to themselves. In simple terms, if you remove the interdependent factors of which phenomena consist, the phenomena themselves would disappear because they have no inherent existence of their own, or from their own side. So unless you clearly recognize what is to be negated and what is to be affirmed, there is every chance of descending into nihilism. In this case, what is to be negated is the notion that relative phenomena exist absolutely. On the other hand, it is equally important to affirm that they exist relatively or conventionally. It is important to take care and be very cautious about this; that you should not negate the relative existence of self. But the self which we conceive of now as an absolute entity having independent existence from its own side is to be negated.

So, unless you very profoundly see how you conceive yourself, you will fall into the error, either of absolutism or of nihilism. But if your understanding of self is profound, then you can very easily negate the notion of an inherently-existent “I,” and that negation is Shunyata.

The simple negation of inherent or independent existence is Shunyata. The way we conceive of self, the way we conceive of phenomena, need to be very precisely and clearly recognized. Then you will realize that it is completely different from the real nature of the existence of self. So, it is quite a difficult process of analysis. But unless and until you realize what is to be negated, it is very dangerous to negate anything. You might negate the whole thing, and then you would fall down into nihilism.

So, it is very difficult to verbalise; but through meditation, through observation, you will realise how you conceive the self. It is not yourself which you negate, but that self of which you have formed a conception: that conception is to be negated.

At this moment, if somebody calls you or addresses you, you immediately conceive a self which is almost identical with body, mind, and speech: the gross combination. But you never conceive of self as something very subtle or very different than your conception of it.

Somebody hits you, and you feel that he has hit you, he abused you, he oppressed you: and at that time your conception of “I” is so gross, so monolithic, and so singular. There is the perception of the singularity of “I” which comes forward—a sense of the singular existence of “I,” and that is a misconception, and that misconception is to be negated.

After negating that mode of existence, then you will automatically understand the transitory and interdependent existence of the relative self — and when you realise the relativity of self, it will cease to create attachment or hatred — and it will see, since it is in the right view of self-existence, and it will automatically give you the right view of the existence of others, and then compassion arising from that profound understanding of the equality of all beings will come out naturally.

So, the negation is not negation of the relatively existent self, but the negation is the negation of how we view ourselves right now. That view is to be negated.

In the Canon and in the teachings the self as a whole, as an entity per se, is negated — but at that time the teacher is addressing you directly, attacking, as it were, the way you perceive yourself. It is a method for finding that which indeed is to be negated. So it sometimes seems as though the teachings are negating the total relative self. But we need to separate the teaching technique from the object which it seeks to accomplish. We need to separate these two and identify the object which is to be negated. Only then can the reality of selflessness be realized.

Thursday, November 16, 2017


Great, great, great Uncle Bedazachefczchickleslov Wronski. Great, huh? Fo shizzle my Wronskizzle.

That's quite a mouthful of a name too, huh? Just call him Bedaz for short. Pronounced, "Bad-Azz", with emphasis on the latter syllable. Interesting. He was quite the badass, in fact. But, like it is with almost all us Wronski's, ahead of his time; i.e., well before that term was a term.

Additionally, Uncle, he was the original "bedazzler". Only he did it before glitter and sequins were things. He was, as they say, a man of means; precious and semiprecious gem stones did it for him; that be sparkle. And — you might guess where I'm going here — also before the term bedazzle was a term.

Also, one of the most decorated warriors in the great pantheon of Wronski Warriors of lore, and among most other warriors of any lore for that matter. In the Crimea he was known as the one "who never met a man he didn't kill".

That scimitar ... encrusted with diamonds. Big ones. What did I tell you? I know! He predictably went in for the big "WOW" factor. Blade, as sharp as a razor. Forged over years of painstaking effort by the most famous sword maker of his time. Coincidentally, also a Wronski family member. Sharp ... and, tough. 

Just like Uncle Bedaz. But, hey, that's a Wronski.

To this day among all the family members observant of the Wronski traditions, Thanksgiving — well, in fact, just about at any holiday or family gathering — it is custom to remember Uncle Bedaz's prowess with the sword in a ritual called "Flaying the Bird". Not a pretty sight for outsiders. But to a Wronski, mother's milk. A touchstone for what it is to be a Wronski. By the way, it was Uncle who invented "spatchcocking". He didn't give it that name, he just did the deed. The name was given to the culinary procedure by yet another one of the Wronski clan, Aunty Spatchinzcokschvitzskia. And, oh boy, she was something too! 

But, enough for now. 

And for the full bore Wronski hystericalicity CLICK to go to this page.

Saturday, November 04, 2017

What's the Point of Citing Science?

You can't convince anyone whose mind is already certain they know what you're talking about.

Image may contain: meme and text

The image above was recently posted on a Facebook page I like.

Since I chime in about the benefits of Rolf Structural Integration whenever there seems to be an opening, I said:

"There was Dr. Ida P. Rolf who had this idea of fostering an integration of the Human Energy Field with the Energy Field of the Earth. Depth ecology."

Comment 1: "Interesting."

I added: " “Some individuals may perceive their losing fight with gravity as a sharp pain in their back, others as the unflattering contour of their body, others as constant fatigue, yet others as an unrelentingly threatening environment. Those over forty may call it old age. And yet all these signals may be pointing to a single problem so prominent in their own structure, as well as others, that it has been ignored: they are off balance, they are at war with gravity.” – Ida P. Rolf, Ph.D." 

And this graphic ...



Comment 2: "There has never been a shred of peer-reviewed evidence that "Rolfing" offers any benefits beyond those of a good massage — in fact, for certain issues, it can cause *more* damage."

Me:



Then: "Link to source, please? Meaningless without context."

Wronski: "The photo to the best of my knowledge comes from the files of the Guild for Structural Integration."

Reply: "... hence, worthless." 

Me: "Assuming the representation is accurate and truthful, showing the results of 10 sessions of Rolf Structural Integration, pre/post, at least demonstrates the possibility that we humans can learn to work with Gravity along the same lanes as what architects and the building trades honor in their designs and structures — plumb and square as the cardinal reference for enduring through balance.

" If you want to wait for the Science to come in, go ahead.

"It's like asking the guy at the Wagon Wheel in Birmingham, Michigan to show the scientific proof that the top slice of that eponymous sandwich won't slide off. (Assuming you go back far enough to remember the Wagon Wheel.*)

"Forget about whether Rolfing works. Consider the images in the attached photo. The body is well understood to be plastic. The first thing is to decide if you want to learn to find balance in the make up of your body such that it works with Gravity. Down the road, if you want, Rolf Structural Integration offers personalized assistance."

* The gentleman in this exchange lives in Michigan, near the city of Birmingham. The Wagon Wheel sandwich is an overstuffed affair and a slice of dark bread 6" in diameter.