That's No Way to Treat a Lady!

The Shoes Tell the Story

First I look at the purse. But, the shoes tell the story. In more ways than one, it turns out.

A friend of mine recently reported that she went to the doctor in pain and came back diagnosed with a kidney problem. She got a prescription for some pharmaceutical drug. If she is reading this, then let me say this is in no way an ad hominem. I'm using the situation as an example. But, if the shoe fits, you'll wear it.

As you may know, I've been hammering for years on how poor body posture and structure are either causative and/or somehow implicated in chronic pains and stress. Yet the prevailing mentality is, "Give me a pill, doc!" The medical/pharmaceutical industry is so firmly enfranchised that I enter this where angels fear to tread. I am in no way suggesting or recommending that people stop going to doctors, or taking pills. Some of my best friends are both. Also, I don't have the science in on it (yet), so I can't make any definitive claim, except to appeal to that old thing; you know, it's called common sense.

[Which gives me the occasion to make the point on the politicization of science. Depending on what side of the case you're on, it's either 1) we can't do that because there's not sufficient scientific evidence, or 2) we can do that because there's no scientific evidence not to. In other words, lack of scientific evidence is a straw man for doing what you want or being against somebody else doing what you don't want. Does anybody see the problem with that?]

Back to our gal pal. Coincidentally, the lady likes those high heel shoes. Just before announcing the kidney issue — only a day before, in fact —  she firmly stated that she is aware of health warnings about wearing high heels, but frankly doesn't mind the cheat, presumably in exchange for showing up looking good. (I once had a client who was a professional dance instructor. She always wore high heels. Even though her instep on the top of her foot was necrotic black. No further comment on that one. My mistake was keeping her as a client even though she "dug her heels in" on the recommendation to wear more sensible shoes. I have stopped waiting for folks to change their minds. No looking back. Follow if you want. Me and Mr. Dylan. We . . . Don't Look Back.)

Listen. I like to see a lady with a nice leg, in high heels. Very captivating aesthetically and sensually. There's nothing like that fine tapered line. Also, that she's easy to chase. But on this occasion we're talking about chronically wearing those heels; and, especially, what a grievance that is when one's career requires standing for long periods of time. 

Now, let's get down to it; just us girls. It's about getting the guy. In marketing there is such a thing as trial. But the clincher is something called "repeat [purchase]." If you're looking good wearing those heels and he notices then what? Well if you reel him in, what's in the pretty package should deliver on the promise. The thing about heels is that they crank your pelvis. That's fine if you're a young thing with a well lubricated and swinging mojo. As you mature and keep wearing those high heels, it does something to the "nether region." To put it straightforwardly, it tightens up the whole thing. Tight is good, but not the whole thing. It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing is not an idle notion. So, bottom line girls, you wear those pretty pumps long enough and all you can do is lay there like a lox. As we said, maybe once. But it don't make him want to keep coming back for more. Again, please spare the feminist protests. Not until the entire culture gets off marketing and promoting the ubiquitous promises of attractive sexual youthfulness.

The point I am making is about having a firm grasp of the obvious. It doesn't take a scientist to understand that high heels modify one's posture. Literally, if all you did was to put on high heels, and not make any adjustments upstairs, you would fall flat on your face. So, you automatically make adjustments, whether consciously or not. One area of prime effect is the pelvis. But, there are other compensations all up and down the body structure. Even all the way up in the keppe. Capisci? Think hydrostatic pressure on the brain. Again, maybe us gents like the ladies in those high heels because they not only slow you down on the move, but also in the head. No comments from the feminists, please. I kid, on that one.

The one that may not be so obvious is the strain that occurs at the level of the juncture between the lumbar and thoracic spine. That would be where the kidneys are located. So, while I can't prove this is so in the lovely lady's situation, it's not that unlikely that high heels could cause some discomfort or pain in the kidney region. Even that there is some connection. Hey, throw me a bone here. Surely you see it that much? Most medically trained folks may not look at the more global factors such as body structure balance; instead, they go to the local issue. In other words, pain in the kidney region means something's wrong with the kidneys. May be. But maybe just it's the dogs down there barking.

I'm not a doctor. But even when I played doctor as a kid, my usual advice was that if it hurt when you do that, then stop doing that.

Just saying.

Just like all Polacks (it's not discrimination if it's true) have flat foreheads and round shoulders. (I'm of Polish descent, so I know from what-what.) You ask them a question, they shrug their shoulders. Give them the answer, they slap their forehead. Over time, this sets in. As for high heels, the image above shows what's setting in there. Verbum Sap Sat.