Pêche Poussé

A friend went out to a fancy French restaurant looking for an amazing meal. Spare no expense.

“Please won’t you prepare your very best dishes for me, chef’s choice.”

Course following course. Every one, a triumph. Each, better than the other.

Finally, the dessert course . . .

The maître de arrives tableside with a cart on top of which is a pyramid of the most exquisite colorful ripe peaches precisely placed on a gold tray surrounded by pink roses. He is accompanied by a gorgeous young lady wearing a peachy pink outfit with a short skirt with lots of ruffles and petticoats.

The maître de selects the prime most peach, inserts a fork into it and proceeds to peel the juicy fruit in one deft movement. Like a Frenchman who has been married many times.*

He then smugly bows and presents the peach to the diner with a grand flourish.

On cue the young lady lifts her skirt. It is clear to be seen that she is not wearing any panties. And, as smooth as a peach herself. The maître de gently places the juicy peach between her soft ingénue thighs, whereupon she proceeds to wriggle and writhe, squirming and gyrating around the peach between her legs.

After quite a long time she stops and the maître de lifts up the peach and exclaims, “Voilà, monsieur, Pêche Poussé!”

Shocked, the man blurts out, “No way am I going to eat THAT peach!”

The maître de diplomatically rejoins, “Ah, monsieur, the peach . . . the PEACH you do not eat.”

* A friend of mine married a French girl. He told the story of meeting her parents, and being presented with the task of peeling a pear without breaking the peel. It should come of in one piece. Presumably, a test to see how much care and attention he would devote to their darling little girl.


Anonymous said...

I read a version of this joke decades ago in Playboy. My only quibble with it is that Google Translate translates "Pêche Poussé" as "Driven fishing". I don't speak French, so I can't speak for the accuracy of the translation.

David D. Wronski said...

Thanks for your comment. Take the quibble up with Google Translate. And, hey come on, it's a joke anyway.

Best wishes.