Saturday, August 16, 2014

App Store Complete Set



1. Flux Capacitor Oscillation Overstruster. Great for exploring the space time continuum at accelerated speeds. No barriers, no limits.


2. Infrared Cooktop. Great for keeping that cup of coffee hot. Cup O' Noodles. A special hand warmer setting. And, for large tablets only: stadium bench heater.


3. Candy Crush Color Bomb. When you need to do something drastic . . . and, quick.


4. Candy Crush Nirvana. It's possible. Just keep playing. And . . . paying.


5. Kitty Cuteness-O-Meter. One touch check-it-out before you share on the social media.


6. Lava Lamp. Create the right mood. For "lovin' it" in the van. Shagadelic, man!

  
7. Neuralizer. For starting over with a clean (mental) slate.


8. Nip Alert. Never miss a thing. (Oh, you know what we mean.) 


Works like this: 



9. Apple [on your] Brain . . . Get smart! Connect your keppe to the infinitude of all information ... BIG DATA. Gives you total control. And, absolute perfect execution. Stuck? No problem. Just swipe the "CLOUD NOW!" function and you can spend as much time as you care to fully controlled by the "Higher Power®"*, colloquially known as the final and ultimate algorithm.

The "CLOUD NOW" is set to a default time-in-use at 4 hours. Longer than that and we will call your doctor for you. And, the police. Not to worry, though. Foolproof. Never fail. Secure. 


* "Higher Power®" is a registered trademark of EmmCoTech®

10. Instant Chinese ... for Social Media Consumption. When you want to share a picture, but the food isn't all that, all that. Use the "Outsourced the China", aka "Instant Wok" app and your culinary creations will astound all your [virtual] friends.

How about some Ramen? Voilร !



Here's how it works for Pea Soup. Pretty snazzy, heh?


There's no end to the possibilities . . . 












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